Reality Shows never cease to surprise me … in a bad way.
The latest crazy idea I’ve seen advertised is a show called “Blind date”, where a couple of total strangers get married on their first date.
Can you imagine?
They haven’t even had time to feel any kind of physical attraction, much less to get to know each other enough to believe they could enjoy sharing their lives together.
Call me old fashioned but way before I even considered getting married to whom is now my hubby, we knew each other pretty well (and I guess 16 happy years together mean we did something right when we chose each other)
While this show is probably only fiction, and nobody gets married with anyone, the truth is we tend to approach our career choices in a very similar fashion.
Choosing the career path that is right for you it’s very similar to finding the right life partner. And surprisingly, this comparison has helped a lot of professional women approach their career change process in a much more relaxed way.
Similarities between love and choosing your ideal career path:
Exactly as you would do when you are open for a new relationship, you need to do when searching for your ideal career.
You first go out there with an open mind, to see what you find attractive or interesting, and with the only expectation of meeting new people and having fun. No commitments on your part at all.
Once you find a career path that seems special, you start “dating” it (or them) with the only expectation of getting to know them better, see if you enjoy spending time doing those things. You do this by running what I call a Real Life Experiment.
Finally, when true love has awaken in you, you’ll feel the longing to spend as much time as possible doing that thing. And that will be the sign for you that you are ready to commit to it, because it could be your ideal career path (or a part of your portfolio career).
Scramble this sequence and you’ll create a lot of anxiety and unnecesary stress for yourself. Whenever we try to commit to a career path without having the right kind of validation for it, fear will show up. As it rightly should, by the way.
So don’t force yourself to make any career choices before you are ready, and finding that level of clarity involves following the previous sequence.
But I’m well aware that most of us resist this sequence. We tend to put a lot of pressure on ourselves to know what we are supposed to be doing next. Wanting to know before we run the experiments or before we know who we truly are.
Again, the reason is mostly some kind of fear: of of wasting our time, fear of not being able to make an income with what we love, fear of choosing the wrong career path, again…
If you want to get rid of some of those fears, you want to read my ebook: “5 Career Change Traps keeping you stuck in a meaningless job”
Charo’s coaching question for you:
Take a bit of time today to reflect on these questions:
- Are you putting too much pressure on yourself by trying to commit when you are NOT ready yet?
- Based on those 3 stages, what action would you need to take right now to gain the level of career clarity you need?
- Please, share your thoughts and let’s keep up the conversation in the comments section below.Charo
P.S. You can download a free copy of my ebook The 5 Career Change Traps by clicking on the image below: